Tuesday, May 31, 2011
Worst day of my life.
I got pissed like so many times at my boi until I demand for a break. After crying and complaining to other people saying that I am single. I read on my fren's facebook profile something like 'I still go back to him heartbreak after heartbreak and i just dont know why'. These words slapped me a the face. I am being a selfish bitch. I know that I am trying to make Babykins a better man for me, but i am not being patience. I am rushing it. I dont really blow my top off like this but I think cuz of my mum take my money from the bank and leaving me with nothing is making me on edge. I cant stay at home. I just had to see him. To tell him sorry. To tell him i still do love him. To beg him for forgiveness. I used the only 10 i had to go down to Toa Payoh to met him.
Right when i saw him, my heart didnt feel heavy. My love for him is soo strong. I couldnt leave him. I felt like slapping myself until I bleed. I am a selfish bitch who doesnt deserve him at all. I only cared about my feelings and not his. Babykins if u are reading this. U dont deserve a bitch like me. U wont be happy with me in your arms. U only keep quiet when I curse you. You shouldn't be quiet babe. U know that I am in the wrong. Why do you keep quiet and let me hurt you? Do you enjoy getting hurt? I know you dont babykins. U HATE it when we fight. I know you love me babe but please scold me or curse me back when I am in the wrong. You cant let me bring u down. I am wayy diff when I get mad. We both are. I love you so much babe and i really do.
Forgive me dear love, cuz i am hurt you. I had torn that wonderful heart of yours so many times yet you are still loving me. You still hug me and protect me from the darkness. I really dont know how to repay you back.
I got pissed like so many times at my boi until I demand for a break. After crying and complaining to other people saying that I am single. I read on my fren's facebook profile something like 'I still go back to him heartbreak after heartbreak and i just dont know why'. These words slapped me a the face. I am being a selfish bitch. I know that I am trying to make Babykins a better man for me, but i am not being patience. I am rushing it. I dont really blow my top off like this but I think cuz of my mum take my money from the bank and leaving me with nothing is making me on edge. I cant stay at home. I just had to see him. To tell him sorry. To tell him i still do love him. To beg him for forgiveness. I used the only 10 i had to go down to Toa Payoh to met him.
Right when i saw him, my heart didnt feel heavy. My love for him is soo strong. I couldnt leave him. I felt like slapping myself until I bleed. I am a selfish bitch who doesnt deserve him at all. I only cared about my feelings and not his. Babykins if u are reading this. U dont deserve a bitch like me. U wont be happy with me in your arms. U only keep quiet when I curse you. You shouldn't be quiet babe. U know that I am in the wrong. Why do you keep quiet and let me hurt you? Do you enjoy getting hurt? I know you dont babykins. U HATE it when we fight. I know you love me babe but please scold me or curse me back when I am in the wrong. You cant let me bring u down. I am wayy diff when I get mad. We both are. I love you so much babe and i really do.
Forgive me dear love, cuz i am hurt you. I had torn that wonderful heart of yours so many times yet you are still loving me. You still hug me and protect me from the darkness. I really dont know how to repay you back.
what we could have been, 12:27 AM.
